Gen 1:27-28 27 So God created mankind in his own image,
in the image of God he created them;
male and female he created them.
28 God blessed them and said to them, “Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky and over every living creature that moves on the ground.”
According to the above, God created us for procreation and dominion. God is love and has manifested His love for man in a special way. By making man in His own image, He has also given man the absolute ability to do all He can do. Procreation is an ability from God to all His creature. There is a seed in every harvest. The purpose for procreation in man is for a continuity of God’s love and His purpose here on earth.
Parenting requires a long term planning about what the object of our desire should be like within a given time and the requirements for accomplishing such goal. When a man falls in love with a woman and decides he wants to marry her, the very next thing they should talk about is CHILDREN. It should be clear to them as to whether both of them are willing to bring forth children into this world or not. If the former is the case, then they need to be serious reviews by both couple but if otherwise, then they are on the same page and can as well go ahead and discuss children. No one starts a business without careful consideration, planning and outlining the goals. Why then don’t we see children as investments that should be planned for?
What is the model you want to present to your child?What are the characters, attitude, behaviour, values you intend to develop in your child? What are the strategies you wish to use to meet your goals?What do you want for your children? It is necessary to clarify the qualities you want to develop in your children for it will help you develop those qualities in yourself first because you can’t give what you don’t have.
We overlook these things. The marriage counselor focuses on the couple alone, teaching them how to be submissive and love each other, forgetting that these two people are coming together for God’s definite purpose and teaching them what they need to know about that too.
Having children changes people’s perspective. I wish I knew these things earlier. Sometimes, our children are the bone of contention between me and my husband and yet, we love them like craze. Sometimes, parents have conflicting ideas on parenting which affects how they relate to each other with regards to the children. Children need a united front. They need to know that “this is what mummy and daddy wants and not just what mummy wants”.
The choice of school, whether they will be house-helps employed to work in the house or not, whether the mother will work from home or pursue her career from the workplace should be decided before the big day. Financial obligations, spiritual developments, academic achievements should top the list for issues to be discussed before they say “I do”. When these things are deliberated on ahead of time,there will be no room for unpleasant surprises. To breastfeed a child or not sometimes need to be discussed as some men and even women have aversion to breast feeding.Sleeping conditions, the type of entertainment and television programme the child will be exposed to are integral part of parenting.
We are the result of things that have shaped us. Therefore we should consider the significant events in our lives. We should review our childhood memories and the impact they had on us and how they affect what we want for our children and how it affects our parenting skills too. Our children will not have the same childhood that we have, else, they will be called robots.
Maybe, you are someone like me that have said “I do” before I realised that parenting is not as easy as the fantasy I created and demands the use of a manual. It is not yet late to make a few changes. If you are a new or intending parent, then hang along. Things are taking shape here and after a few classes, you will get the feel of it and not expect a miracle. Parenting is hardwork and hardwork pays.