We hardly discuss church matters in our house but whenever we do,I feel so uneasy when my mom asks, “bia nke nwanyi, I si na I ma akpolu umuaka jee Anglican church”. (won’t you take these kids to an Anglican church). Most times, I manage to tell her that church is church and they are OK where they are now. She always, always sighs in answer.
This post is definitely not meant to disparage any church nor religion but to point out how difficult it is to take certain decisions when children are involved.
Presently, I attend a Pentecostal church and I am loving every bit of it. I have always been an ardent lover of the Pentecostals from my days in the University. Even when I tried to regularly attend the Anglican church, I always find myself going back to the Pentecostal. It wasn’t difficult for me to continue in that lane after marriage , even though we got married in the Anglican church as both of us are Anglicans.
However, I still remember the days we attended Sunday School when I was younger. I look back with nostalgia and wish I was more involved in the activities. Maybe, I would have learnt to be comfortable in my Anglican skin.
Fast forward to this present day and my kids.
We attend a church where I love the children church. The first time we went there, my kids said they won’t want to go to another church and I told them we won’t. That was until I was with my friend some days ago. She is an Anglican and has found the parish she is comfortable with. She mentioned how her daughter will start attending confirmation classes when school starts and the girl’s guild and Brigade membership plans she has for her children. It hit me real bad and reminded me of the days my mom raised her objections to taking the kids away from the church which I was born into. It made me realise how important some foundations are. It is a known fact that the Pentecostals don’t need to go through the process of confirmation before the child starts to receive the Holy Communion. It is believed that everyone is eligible to receive the Communion at any age. Why then does the picture of my first Holy Communion service keeps playing ten-ten in my head.
Could it be my early stay in the Anglican church that built the foundation for the love of God in me? I can’t tell for sure but it must have had a hand. Call me a traditional person but I think I will love my kids to have a foundation, a part of their roots dug in the church where their mommy learnt her first stories about God, the Apostle’s Creed and the hymns that still speaks to my heart. It might be the life line they will need as they become mature. I won’t want them stumbling at an older age because mommy didn’t teach them right. I can never tell if they will always worship God in the Anglican church. They may grow up and go their ways. I don’t know what will happen tomorrow but I will love them to have many options to chose from and the Anglican church will be one of them.
Motherhood is not a jolly ride especially when the children are in their formative years. One wrong move from us can mar the journey. We will always keep doing trails and error and hope to God that we don’t waste much time on the wrong lane and to know when to set things right.
The task that I am not so looking forward to is telling my kids we are moving church. Chai! They won’t find it funny. However , I cross my fingers and hope to God that this will be one of my best parenting decisions.